A Confident Mind
"Prince to King to Emperor"
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A Forced Journey
"Confidence is key."
We've all heard the saying right?
I believe this saying with all my heart. If there was a religion for Confidence, I'd be a preacher.
Confidence can cause you to succeed. Confidence allows you to fail and still. feel strong enough to succeed.
How do we gain confidence? Are we born with it? Do our circumstances around us when we're young, build, or tear down our confidence? Will nice things give it to us? Can we build it ourselves? Or does it have to be given to us?
These are all questions that many of us deal with in one way or another. You might struggle with these questions and not even know it.
I'm a Rap Artist. I run my own music career and, am Co-CEO of two local businesses. I am no psychologist. I can't answer these questions for sure. I can't promise that what I went through would create the same results in another individual. We are all different.
But let me tell you what I can do.
I can, tell you my own personal battle with confidence. My own journey from a sensitive, self conscience, fat kid. To a internally, and externally, powerful man, who doesn't lack fear, but instead uses fear to motivate himself.
Lets get started.
As a kid I was always chubby. I had a lot of friends and was never really picked on, ever. I did although lack self confidence. I was not a very outgoing or outspoken person. I kept quiet and mainly only spoke when spoken to. By the time I was 16, I was fat, and spent most of my time sitting in my room playing video games.
My family had a lot of issues(I'd prefer not to dive in to that), but lets summarize with, my mom had a lot going on, and although she loved me to the greatest extent, as a single parent, she had a very hard time pushing me forward. My mom and I were always very close. To this day, I still tell her pretty much everything. Even things most young men don't talk about with their parents, but that's for another Blog Post.
One day something changed. Not really sure what, but my mom finally had enough. I was 18 and she forced me to go out and get a job. She wasn't really met with much adversity because I think I was just about bored with sitting around and playing video games, I wanted more also.
This is where I realized I had confidence issues.
Sitting in your room and only communicating with people over a microphone doesn't really equal with the real world. I never knew I lacked confidence. It wasn't something I really thought, or cared about. Until I really joined the real world.
Applying for jobs was nerve racking for me. I didn't mind filling out a paper but having to actually interview for a position seemed scary. I also wanted to start working out, but again, the idea is great, but going to the gym is, scary. This was all due to a lack of confidence within myself.
This was the first hurdle I had to over come. I needed basic, "normal" confidence. Just enough to get out and start going. I went about building the confidence to get out there the same way most people do it, slowly. I went to the gym at times when very few people were there. mainly early mornings and late nights. Once I started going to the gym, it gave me enough strength to go to a job interview. It was all coming along.
So I got in the gym, got the job, and from there things got better. I lost a ton of weight, looked really good, at the same time, my social skills were at an all time high because I was working with a bunch of girls at my new job, don't laugh, Dunkin Donuts.
Confidence was building.
I still remember the day "Bry the King" was born. I was around 18, maybe just about to turn nineteen. All the girls I was working with at Dunkin Donuts were leaving for college. This had happened a few times throughout my time there, fast food has a high turnover rate, but this time it stung hard because I really liked this group.
I was washing dishes in the sink at Dunkin and it dawned on me. Everyone is leaving. They're all going to college, and here I am. They're all going to improve their lives and I am stuck here? This just can't happen.
I got my GED and started going to college not long after that.
In college, I had no friends. I struggled to meet anybody. My confidence was not at all what I thought it was. I felt awkward. I remember watching two people talk in the Library one day and thinking to myself "It's like nobody told them that's the hardest thing in the world."
At this point I knew I had to get better at talking to people. I had to be normal like everyone else. I had to push to make up all the lost ground I put on myself, but...
I ended up dropping out of college, and getting a job at, no other than, Wal Mart. Better than Dunkin Donuts I guess, but really regressing back to the same spot on my mental totem pole as before. Behind everyone else.
Believe it or not dropping out kind of helped me. I made it my mission to get over any fear of social awkwardness I had at the time, and I did. I would talk to any person willing to listen. I'd purposely get in to situations that I considered awkward just to prove to myself, that I could do it. I could be normal just like everyone else.
I was obsessed with getting over this fake fear.
It all worked to. I met a whole host of new friends, and was talking to all the girls that worked there. At one point, and I'm not bragging, I was even juggling three girls at once.
I finally felt normal.
Confidence was building
I made it right? I went through this whole battle with my social awkwardness and came out on top. I am finally happy right? Wrong.
The feeling of being "normal" lost its luster very quick. I was hungry. "Normal", seemed to be boring. I wanted more, a lot more. I wanted to be powerful and scared of nothing. I had built an obsession with, not being afraid.
I realized that college wasn't for me but what could I do without it? That's what everyone does. They go to college or they are struggling with bills their whole life. I don't want to struggle. I hate struggling, or watching my family struggle, I wanted to prosper.
"Bry the Emperor" was born.
The day I realized that "normal" was boring, was the day I think "Bry" came in to existence. I started reading books, writing songs, recording songs, and coming up with business strategies. I battled every fear that got in my way, I hated fear. I pushed through ever fear that came up because I knew...
Once you let one fear beat you, any fear can beat you.
I achieved this lack of fear through confidence. Throughout this journey I had constantly set goals, and smashed through them. I knew anything I wanted to do, or have, I would. I believed in myself. My looks, charm, and most importantly, my intelligence. I trusted my decision making. I knew if I didn't have the time to do something myself, I would get the right person for the job.
Once I gained the confidence to overcome any fear, I met an amazing woman who ran her own small business. Together, we built it up much stronger, all the while, starting another local business to add to our Empire. We both also decided to start pushing my music career. We knew if we went about our business we could push this to new heights.
I fully understand how powerful confidence is. If you don't have it, you need to make it your goal, right now, get it. Build it with any step you can. It may take time. Slow steps to build, but get a plan, and get working.
You need confidence.
The Confident Mind,